Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Only By God's Grace

I love my place in life. For the most part. I love my husband. I love my kids. I love my dear friends that are always there for me. Life is good. I'd have to admit that 20 years or more ago, I never dreamed that I would be where I am at this point in my life. I am a very lucky girl.

There is something that my husband has said to me that has stuck with me, because I know deep down it's probably true. He's said in the past, "It's a wonder you turned out so normal". I'd have to admit that the people that I know who had a "normal" upbringing is a minority. Some of us had an alcoholic for a parent(s). Others had a hoarder, or someone who wasn't emotionally available to them. Others who had a parent that just saw things a little greener on the other side of the fence and left a parent to fend for themselves and the kids. Some people I know had to deal with death of a parent much too soon.

Can we blame the flower power of the 1960's or the hippy motto of free love that flowed in the 1970's? What about the excess of the 1980's? It's amazing that each generation has some sort of devilish influence that just wants to tear down the values of family and what a family should be.

At some point God grabbed a hold of me and I was awake enough to realize it. Praise God. I knew from my past what I didn't want for my marriage and kids. I know I am no June Cleaver, but my kids aren't going to grow up the way I did. They deserve the best that their parents can give. My kids will not know what it's like to have an alcoholic for a parent. Or a hoarder. They will not know what it's like to have a parent insult their appearance, or give them conditional love.

God still has a lot of work to do on me. I like to joke that my spiritual gift is a "cynical or critical spirit". But, I praise God everyday for the miracle that He has done in my life. He will soften my critical spirit over time. If I just let Him.

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