An Open Letter to the Woman My Mother Gave Up for Adoption

Secrets always have a way of coming to the surface. It's so cliche', but still so true. My mom had a secret that she would have liked for it to stay buried. The secret started calling everyone in my family to get information. I received my phone call on an Easter Sunday a few years back. The attempts to contact family has started again and I'm fed up. I have some things I want to get off my chest to this woman.

Dear One Who Was Given Life, 

Stop means stop. You've been told many years ago that my mom wasn't going to come forward with any information for you. She gave you a life with a family that she could not provide. You may think that you will get some information from someone in my family, but when this was kept secret from many in my family you won't get that far. My mother's wish is to keep it in the past. 

You've involved practically everyone in my family. Even family on my father's side who had no idea. I'm not sure I can forgive that you included my father's side of the family. Things were chilly between my mother and people on my father's side and now I can imagine why. You were born long before my mother met my father. There was no reason to involve my father's family. 

As far as health issues, there are none. My mother's diabetes was adult onset. It is not hereditary. Most of the people in my mother's family who have died have died from old age. No cancer. No nothing. My aunt wonders if my grandmother would have lived longer if the private detective you sent to her door hadn't shown up. My grandmother died a couple of weeks later. Your doctor should be able to run tests to see what you are genetically predisposed to. 

Please. You have to accept that my mother is not going to come forward with any information. Those in our family will show their allegiance to my mother first. My mother chose life for you. Let it be and let it go. This will not change.